Shark Movie Sunday: HOUSE SHARK (2017)
Would you be brave enough to ask a shark to pay rent?
Welcome to Shark Movie Sunday - where every Sunday we will take a look at a random shark movie from around the world.
This series hasn’t gotten off to a good start with a few dud movies, but not today! Oh no, today’s movie is something really special.
And it’s still not a great movie, but at least it knows it’s not a great movie!
I present to you House Shark. And for once the title is completely accurate!
THE STORY
An ex-sheriff suffering some kind of weird PTSD comes home from a date to discover his son’s babysitter has been eaten by a shark while sitting on the toilet doing her business.
Panicked, he starts living in a tent in his backyard with his son while simultaneously attempting to sell the house through Reagan Real Estate. A house which he refuses to let people walk through as the shark is still in there.
Well, his prediction comes true. During the houses first showing, the two potential buyers are eaten by the shark while they engage in some funky business.
The real estate agency then sends a man called Abraham to join the ex-sheriff and a strange German man called Zachary who is hiding a macabre secret. The three men then devise a plan to kill the House Shark that involves them trapping themselves in the house and dressing up as a female shark to lure him out.
Hilarity ensues.
THE SHARK
That last part wasn’t sarcasm. Hilarity really does ensue, providing you’re open to the non-politically correct humour on display in this film.
But let’s talk about the shark.
To be honest, I don’t think the director ever intended to use a real looking shark for this movie. And that’s what adds to the hilarity of the film.
The shark is simply just a big costume that the director and his crew have created. There is no illusion of realism. Let’s be honest, the shark is supposed to travel between the walls and walks upstairs - it was never intended to be realistic!
But the backstory is even more hilarious and involves the German-but not really character of Zachary who was conducting an experiment which went awry.
And then, if you stick around to the ending, which you will because this movie is funny, you will see that Zachary is pregnant with a baby shark in his belly.
The director has produced many shark movies since this came out, but we’ve yet to receive a sequel to this.
THE EFFECTS
Are you expecting Hollywood style CGI or Harryhausen-esque animation?
If so, go watch another movie.
Thankfully this movie wears its heart on its sleeve quite proudly when it comes to its creative low-budget effects.
On top of the shark costume, which is hilarious in its utter ridiculousness, it’s the visual effects that add to the absolute charm of this movie.
And honestly if you don’t find this movie charming, that’s on you. For a micro-budget movie, this movie has a lot of personality, even if its goofy at times.
The best example I can give you is the so-called underwater scene at the end of the movie. Quite frankly, when you don’t have a budget to flood a set and shoot an authentic underwater scene, then what these guys did here is the next best thing.
Maybe not the next best, but it was a great solution.
First, add a blue/green colour filter over the frame. Then add a nice wavy effect on the video that emulates water. Don’t show your actors feet touching the ground, instead ensure it looks like they are paddling water in slow motion. Don’t forget to add some bubbles coming out of their mouths for that breathing effect, and then hang all your props on fishing wire to show they are floating - but definitely don’t try to remove the wire off the frame.
I have to admit, it’s a genius micro-budget solution where the end result is both ludicrous and fabulous. Well done team.
There are other similar effects when the blood spurts are on screen in the shark attack scenes, but they don’t have the same creativity as this underwater scene.
Also, I love the gun Zachary uses. A plastic-ish toy gun with a CD stuck to it. Lovely.
WHAT DID I LIKE?
I liked that they tried. They really tried.
The humour here is not for everyone. All the characters are named after US presidents and there is what could be considered homophobic language, so if that kind of thing offends you to the point of you participating in cancel culture, perhaps steer well clear of this movie.
There is one thing in the real estate office that had me in stitches. There is supposed to be a statue in the background of the founder of the estate agency, but instead of it being a mannequin or something similar, it’s just one of the actors trying his hardest to stay as still as possible. It’s utterly hilarious if this is your type of humour.
As is this newspaper headline:
For fans of nude woman, of which I am one - fan that is, not a nude woman - then the movie opens with a lovely nude scene of the babysitter completely disrobing as she sits on the toilet to poop. Completely unneeded, but definitely welcomed, it’s not every day you see nudity in a micro-budget movie that not some alternative heavily tattooed person. Unfortunately, that’s the only nude scene in the film, but it’s enough.
I liked the main characters too. The acting is more than good enough for a movie like this, and even the overacting of Abraham and the Native American suits the film. I don’t like Star Wars, but I didn’t mind the references to it either. They didn’t feel too shoehorned in.
And another positive, the movie actually has a story that’s easy to follow. Usually these micro-budget movie stories are ruined by the rotten acting and production values, but that’s not present in this film.
This is a micro-budget shark movie made by someone who loves to make movies but has limited capacity to do it!
WHAT DIDN’T I LIKE?
But the length of the movie is a bit off-putting. This title clocks in at almost two hours, which is unheard of for both micro-budget and shark movies, unless you are The Meg, which is not micro-budget but you get what I mean.
Thankfully the movie is interesting enough, but the long run time means there is a lot of filler content, and it takes a long time in-between the first to second, then second to third instances of the shark appearing on screen.
There is a lot of other things you can pick on with a micro-budget title like this, but I am not going to. Compared to the previous two movies we looked at: Cocaine Shark and Psycho Shark, this movie is a masterpiece.
IF I am only comparing it to those two films.
RECOMMENATIONS
You kind of have to be in the mood to watch a silly shark movie to fully enjoy this one, but it’s possible, and that makes it a fun movie to experience.
With ridiculousness all round and its ability to be fully self-aware and not take itself serious at all, this movie is for someone with a sense of humour and doesn’t walk around with a stick up their ass.
Boring, stuff people steer well clear of this one. There is too much fun here for someone like you. For you teenage boys, get this movie in ya!
Genre Shark Comedy Movie
Director Ron Bonk
Starring Trey Harrison, Wes Reid, Michael Merchant
Original Title House Shark
Alternative Title N/A
Country of Origin USA
Release Date 21 October 2017